After graduating from Brevard College in 2018, I moved back in with my folks for the summer to plan my next step. It was difficult for me to be back home during the summertime; constantly reminded of growing up and spending summer days fishing and water skiing on the lake or driving around to see friends. Moving home post-grad, I got a job at the new grocery store to save money. I would end my shifts with a walk to the floral display and buy a sunflower to distract me further. Then, I would go home and paint the flower alla-prima, a wet-on-wet painting, in a single sitting. This first year of grief saw a lot of repetitive artworks. This practice, in retrospect, seems to have been a means to establish order in my day-to-day. I attempted to numb the feeling of loss while creating a pseudo-sense of balance in my daily routine.